Friday QuoteDay

"Under the current ‘tyranny of slenderness’ women are forbidden to become large or massive; they must take up as little space as possible. The very contours of a woman’s body takes on as she matures -- the fuller breasts and rounded hips -- have become distasteful. The body by which a woman feels herself judged and which by rigorous discipline she must try to assume is the body of early adolescence, slight and unformed, a body lacking flesh or substance, a body in whose very contours the image of immaturity has been inscribed. The requirement that a woman maintain a smooth and hairless skin carries further the theme of inexperience, for an infantilized face must accompany her infantilized body, a face that never ages or furrows its brow in thought. The face of the ideally feminine woman must never display the marks of character, wisdom, and experience that we so admire in men.”

— Sandra L. Bartky, philosopher, "Foucault, Femininity and the Modernization of Patriarchal Power," in Feminism and Foucault: Paths of Resistance

Friday QuoteDay

"I’ve been told by producers, 'Well, you know we need to get on this because you’re not getting any younger ...' Women are reminded of their age all the time and it’s usually by a fricking fat, big-bellied old man with a comb-over and you look at him and you’re like, 'Really? Give me a break. You just have more money and more power in this situation than I do, but not in my life.'"

— Zoë Saldaña, American actress in InStyle UK, June 2013

Image property of InStyle UK. Click to enlarge.

Friday QuoteDay

"It's the disconnect of being trained since birth to look a certain way, only to have dudes turn around and go, 'Don't you know we hate all that stuff on your face?' Like it was our idea! Like women collectively woke up one day and thought, 'Wouldn't it be awesome to slap a bunch of chemicals and dyes on our faces every morning from now on?'

We've got a multi-billion dollar industry doing their best to remind us daily that we need what they're selling, so don't act all befuddled about where we got the idea that we looked better this way. Plus, it's not like men don't still expect us to look beautiful. They just don't want us cheating with cosmetics. Hope your face is naturally flawless! 

And while we're talking, don't you ladies know how annoying it is that you're all hung up on your weight? Sure, we expect you to have a great body. But don't be one of those lame girls who orders salads on a date. We like to see you eat! 

Most of the time, when men say they prefer 'natural beauty,' they don't mean that they're ready for us to start leaving the house the way we roll out of bed in the morning. They mean that they want us to look perfect without appearing to try. 

Basically, it's a trap. 

— Emily McCombs, Editor at XOJane, "On Men Who Don't Like Women In MakeUp" 

Hollywood Lessons For Young Ladies

Nothing in media or pop culture exists within a vacuum. Today on FitC, we visit three recent films that are aimed at children and young adults. We are forever absorbing messages through media, and these three films are perpetuating subtle and sometimes blatant lessons for young women and their expected place in the world. (A reminder: To pass the Bechdel Test, a film must have 1.) At least two women 2.) who have a conversation 3.) about something other than men.) Let's have a look, shall we?

Jack attack. Image via Wikipedia.

Jack the Giant Slayer 

Plot: There's Jack, some magic beans, a beanstalk, and fee fi foe fumm giants. Standard fairy tale stuff. This version includes an intrepid princess who Jasmines her way out of the palace to escape her arranged marriage and seek adventure. She is the Smurfette of the film, and doesn't do much except become giant bait and provide a way for Jack to become a hero. This isn't necessary a bad thing; we can't all be heroes. Sometimes we need to be saved. It's Jack's story. The problem comes when the damsel in distress the ONLY representation of women we see. And in this particular batch of movies? Jack the Giant Slayer is not only the film that is (surprisingly!) the most entertaining, but the most tolerable when comes to positive representation. Chew on that for a minute.

Main Female Characters: One. Apparently giants reproduce asexually, as there are no lady giants in the bunch.

Does it pass the Bechdel Test?: No. There's a brief prologue scene of young Isabelle reading a story with her mother, but the story is about a brave king and the giants.

Lesson for Young Girls: Be an adventurer! But only if it helps a random dude. Waiting for the array of knights in shining armor to show up and save you is a great way to pass the time. Have you brushed your hair today?

Subtext: Your grand adventure is to wait for the male adventurer in your life to save you. Try not to screw it up by being self-sufficient.

Side Note: At one point, the princess is put in gold-plated armor. It gave me false hope she would actually join in the giant slaying. Sadly, this was just for show.

Beautiful Creatures: Ugly Stereotypes. Image via Wikipedia.

Beautiful Creatures

Plot: Teen Cardboard Cut-Out Forrest Gump is in love with Lena, a teen witch. Lena is on the verge of becoming a good witch or a bad witch. Dark "casters" are shunned by the good witch community, and Lena is being trained by her uncle to chose the light and become good. Her mother and cousin plot to have Lena join the dark side and rule the world with them. I think? I dunno, this movie was, like, 20 hours long, with terribly repetitive smooching between Teen Witch Barbie and Ken, mind-numbingly boring, and managed to fit in every Southern stereotype possible. (Even Civil War re-enactments!)

Main Female Characters: 3. A cringe-inducing Magical Negro character (played by Viola Davis, who deserves better), spends the entire movie helping white people solve their problems and playing nursemaid to Forrest Gump. Lena, who plays the role of exceptional girl and rejects the women in her life in favor of Forrest and the approval of her uncle. And the mother and cousin witches, who are all sex and evil and of course must be destroyed and seriously, ugh. UGH. This racist, sexist movie.

Does it pass the Bechdel test?: Maybe? At one point the mean mom witch and teenage girl witch were talking about her future, and how powerful and strong and dark she could be? But they probably jumped right back on the topic of Teenage Dream Forrest Gump before the audience could get uncomfortable ideas about Lena's independence.

Lesson for Young Girls: Your boyfriend and male influences are way more important than your mother. Mom-witch is no longer virginal or matronly, and failing to fit into the assigned spaces of womenhood, must be destroyed. Does your uncle like you enough? Work on that. Have you sacrificed enough for your teen boyfriend so that his dreams of college and a bright future can be met? Try harder. And if you're a young woman of color? White people aren't gonna clean up their own messes.

Subtext: Work hard so your menfolk will be happy. If you have the approval of the men in your life, you don't need any other women. (Except your one black friend, who lives to serve you.)

Side Note: Aziz Ansari and Stephen Colbert are two actors who were born and/or raised in South Carolina. Neither sound anything like Ken Doll Forrest Gump's atrocious accent. The Hollywood stereotypes of the South seen in this movie are a whoooole other post.

Oz the what now? Image via Wikipedia.

Oz The Great and Powerful

Plot: The hero of the story is a conman who lands on Oz to stick his penis into things. And save Oz? But his name is also Oz? And it's all kind of a 3-D, technicolor mess with a middling, passive storyline that puts James Franco and his penis around beautiful women who are stuck with a dull script that leaves little for them to do? Oz claims to be a wizard and all the witches fall all over themselves for him. After a nighttime romp with one witch, who declares the next morning that she is happy to become the future queen of Oz, he runs off to meet another witch and lust after some gold exactly like Scrooge McDuck and I don't know, y'all. There's munchkins and fireworks and I mean, why can't the witches just run Oz on their own? Look. This about sums it up: At one point the movie even addresses the manipulative way Oz ups and leaves the ladies who love him, and the sidekick monkey states, "You broke that poor girl's heart." Prompting Oz to answer blithely, "She'll get over it. They always do." When a bellhop-clad flying monkey voiced by Zach Braff is your voice of reason, there is something wrong with your movie.

Main Female Characters: 3 or 4, witches and a living China Doll, all dependent upon Oz to save or woo them.

Does it pass the Bechdel Test?: Ha.

Lesson for Young Girls: If you have a sexual encounter ("Dancing," as Disney says. They stay up all night "dancing.") with someone who is charming and kind and says all the right things but who is really a conman, it's still your fault for falling for it. Congratulations. You are now a wicked witch woman who deserves warts and scorn and not even the reprieve of a nice spa day because you can't get wet. Watch out for falling houses.

Subtext: No sex before marriage, or you will turn green and warty. But only if you're a girl. Boys get to become consequence-free kings.

Side Note: This prequel film taints Judy Garland's heroics. When the wizard sends Dorothy to kill the wicked witch in 1939's The Wizard of Oz, now it isn't so much a test of her faith and courage, but a way to dispatch his ex-girlfriend without getting his hands dirty. What a hero.

Film.com published an excellent and well-researched article on this topic, and gives us this great quote:

In a bitter reversal of Baum’s stories, “Great and Powerful” casts the women as the sidekicks, standing by to aid the Wizard should he need it. No longer instigators of action, the witches Glinda, Theodora, and Evanora now clasp their hands at arrival, thrilled the prophesied hero has arrived (“Aren’t you the great man we’ve been waiting for?” asks Theodora, voice trembling. Actually, all the female dialogue seems to be on the wobbly verge of tears). Whereas Baum’s charlatan Wizard accidentally became ruler of Oz, making a mess of things in the process, now we have one who has a place carved out for him, and is hailed as the man “who can set things right” (silly witches, always making a mess of their kingdoms!). Who knew three sorceresses –- who were all-seeing and all-knowing in prior Oz tales -– were actually helpless compared to a man from Kansas? And helpless against him! Yes, Michelle Williams’ Glinda is smart enough to see through our hero’s lies and bluster, but otherwise she’s completely stripped of any real agency. “Great and Powerful” corrects Baum’s grievous abstinence, and reminds us all women must fall for a handsome traveler. The modern day Wizard now wins at least 2/3 of the onscreen hearts instead of being shamed as a liar.

Best to stick with director Sam Raimi's previous work, Xena: Warrior Princess, if you're in the mood for watching something that doesn't involve a demeaning female lead.

Friday QuoteDay: International Women's Day 2013 Edition

Image via stfuconservatives

Today is International Women's Day.

While we raise a toast to the amazing, brave and intelligent women in our lives, we also have to remember why today is still a necessity. Visit internationalwomensday.com to learn about events in your area and ways to reach equality in our lifetime.

Friday QuoteDay

“I suspect it’s difficult for men to imagine a world in which their bodies have long been inextricably linked to their value as an individual, and that no matter how encouraging your parents were or how many positive female role models you had or how self-confident you feel, there is an ever-present pressure that creeps in from all sides, whispering in your ear that you are your body and your body defines you.

A world where, from the time of pubescence on, you can feel the constant and palpable weight of the male gaze, and not just from your male peers but from teachers and sports coaches and the fathers of the children you baby-sit, people you’re supposed to respect and trust and look up to, and that first realization that you are being looked at in that way is the beginning of a self-consciousness that you will be unable to shake for the rest of your life.

Even if they are never verbalized, the rules of bodily conduct for females become clear early on: when school administrators reprimand you for the inch of midriff that shows when you lift your hands straight in the air or youth group leaders tell you that the sight of your unintentional cleavage is what causes godly young men to fall, you learn that your body is dangerous and shameful and that it’s your responsibility to cloister it in a way that is acceptable to everyone else. You learn that your body is a topic of public debate that everyone is entitled to weigh in on, from a male classmate telling you that those jeans make your ass look huge to the male-dominated United States Congress dictating the parameters that rape must fall within to be considered legitimate.

To be a woman, and to live life in a woman’s body, is to be held to a set of comically paradoxical standards that make you constantly second-guess yourself and jump through a million hoops in pursuit of an impossible perfection.”

 — From Thought Catalog's Stop Catcalling Me by Kendall Goodwin

Wild Oscar Talk

Have you been following build-up to the Oscars this year? The awards ceremony is on Sunday, and as usual, I'll be sipping mimosas and watching the film equivalent to the Super Bowl.

If you have followed Oscar news, you may have noticed clear-winner Anne Hathaway's coverage is tinged with a hint of malice. Anne is in the race for her heart-squeezing turn as Fantine in Les Misérables and is worthy of the win. But some don't like her ambitious attitude, or presence, or desire -- all things admirable in an actor, but something to sneer at in an actress. (A quick Google search of "Anne Hathaway" + "Oscar" is only the source needed for this one. Add "hate" at the end of that if you really want to spend time making "ugh" noises at your screen.)

At Creative Loafing, the alternative weekly newspaper here in Charlotte, the Oscar predictions slate Anne for the win. Film critic Matt Brunson perfectly and succinctly sums up Anne's Oscar coverage in one fell swoop, unpacking the media's internalized and ever-present misogyny that shoots women down for being anything less than what they are expected to be in that moment, at every moment of everyday.  

"A not-unexpected whiff of misogyny has hit this year's Oscar season, as evidenced by the disgusting treatment of Hathaway by both the media and the public. The clear frontrunner in this category since Day One, she's been lambasted lately for 'wanting the award too much,' whatever the fuck that means. Gee, funny how the same people complaining about her omniscient presence on talk shows and red-carpet events aren't similarly criticizing Daniel Day-Lewis, Steven Spielberg, Ben Affleck and Robert De Niro, all of whom are doing the exact same thing. At any rate, it would be a disgrace if Hathaway loses because of nastiness."

The film industry has its fill of lady-hate, and it's nothing new. But for this round, it would be nice to let the woman who obviously: Set a goal, worked towards it, wants it, and is on the cusp of fulfilling her goal, to not only have it, but to enjoy it.

Friday Feminism

“Teachers are often unaware of the gender distribution of talk in their classrooms. They usually consider that they give equal amounts of attention to girls and boys, and it is only when they make a tape recording that they realize that boys are dominating the interactions.

Dale Spender, an Australian feminist who has been a strong advocate of female rights in this area, noted that teachers who tried to restore the balance by deliberately ‘favouring’ the girls were astounded to find that despite their efforts they continued to devote more time to the boys in their classrooms. Another study reported that a male science teacher who managed to create an atmosphere in which girls and boys contributed more equally to discussion felt that he was devoting 90 per cent of his attention to the girls. And so did his male pupils. They complained vociferously that the girls were getting too much talking time.

In other public contexts, too, such as seminars and debates, when women and men are deliberately given an equal amount of the highly valued talking time, there is often a perception that they are getting more than their fair share. Dale Spender explains this as follows:

'The talkativeness of women has been gauged in comparison not with men but with silence. Women have not been judged on the grounds of whether they talk more than men, but of whether they talk more than silent women.'

In other words, if women talk at all, this may be perceived as ‘too much’ by men who expect them to provide a silent, decorative background in many social contexts. This may sound outrageous, but think about how you react when precocious children dominate the talk at an adult party. As women begin to make inroads into formerly ‘male’ domains such as business and professional contexts, we should not be surprised to find that their contributions are not always perceived positively or even accurately.”

-- From Language As Prejudice, PBS.org (http://www.pbs.org/speak/speech/prejudice/women)

I have often been told I talk too much. I've been told I am too loud, too boisterous, too much. If I wear heels I am too tall, too show-offy, take up too much room. But this is what I know, as the introverts and the shy and the bullied always know, that if I am quiet, I disappear. Sometimes for the better, to fend off the brutal pokes and bruises of youth. Sometimes for worse, to be overlooked for perks and favors and kindness. As the saying goes, the squeaky wheel gets the oil. Unless that squeaky wheel is underprivileged, or of a skin color, of a gender, of a sexual orientation that those who wield the oil find objectionable. So then we just squeak on and on. Or sometimes we go silent, and never move forward again. And they do not notice when we are gone until they need someone new to kick.

Silence doesn't always protect us. Silence can erase us.

 If young boys are taught in school that on every level their thought process, needs, questions, and ideas matter more than the girls raising their hands next to them, we have failed all of them. We have taught boys not to value half of the human population, to disregard empathy and to put importance on what their male peers think above what is morally and ethically right. And we have taught girls to accept this silently. If children are the roots of our future societies, are the branches of current society, then this is a society that perpetuates a rape culture that allows for women to be subjugated, victimized and blamed at every turn.

And we ALL deserve better. We deserve more than silence.

All Aboard

A bit about this piece, in the artist's own words:

"The original poster, which is a celebrated American cultural symbol, features and glorifies a white woman. While I adore the original image, not every feminist is a white, cisgender, middle class, able bodied woman. In the same way, most mainstream feminism only speaks to that particular group. I made my poster to acknowledge the diverse struggles of the group that gets left behind, and to protest that in order to be effective in deconstructing sexism, we must understand that issues of sexism, race, class, and transphobia all intersect. My experiences as a white woman are very different from those of a WoC [Woman of Color] or a trans*woman or a trans* WoC, for that matter. Despite this, historically it has always been the experiences of white women that get the most representation within the feminist movement. So about damn time that we celebrate the rest of us. Let somebody else have the spotlight." 

Wise words and art from Chelsoir at http://soirart.tumblr.com.

Razzle, No Dazzle

Oh, look.

Breaking CGI. Image via Wikipedia.

The 33rd annual Golden Raspberry Award nominations, the Razzies, have been announced. And blah blah blah you know the rest. Lazy, boring filler paragraph about worst performances followed by gleeful hate at anything aimed at women, aka Twilight. Even in a year that brought Tim & Eric's Billion Dollar Movie, Savages, and The Watch to big screens. (All missing from the Razzies.)

Yawn. Wake me up when this derivative, constant misogyny is over. (I'm prepared to sleep for awhile.) Since we're repeating ourselves, it's as I said in 2011's Raz This:

It's almost as if movies aimed at women are treated as oddities without significance and without the same clout as "regular" movies. You know, the real movies. Those real movies that are always good, without a doubt, because they star dudes and shit.

Because if a movie is aimed at women, it's got to be bad. Teenage girls read Twilight. What do they know? Who cares if it is perhaps the singular mainstream franchise that is aimed at/for teenage girls that does not involve Justin Bieber, and therefore, no matter how bad the source material is, the passionate and financial endorsement of this series may be in part due to the fact that there is nothing else available.

If you're given stale bread, while your male counterparts ages 13-29 are given a full-course buffet with varieties of filet mignon, French cheese and rosemary olive oil croissants, you're going to love that stale bread, damn it. That stale bread is yours and yours alone. Sure, sure, you'll try to steal a bite or two, maybe even enjoy a glass of wine from the table labeled Die Hard but you know it wasn't made for you.

Hate chick flicks? Hate Twilight? Hate Sex and the City and Katherine Heigl?

Then demand wine and meat and brie cheeses. Demand something other than stale bread. And if you are one of those who believes that all chick flicks suck, no matter what, consider the source and count yourself lucky. Because you must be one of those who already ate from the buffet table.

Friday QuoteDay

“They presented male employers with identical job applicants—same experience, same qualifications, same resume—except one was named Dave and the other Diane. Then men in traditional marriages rated 'Diane' significantly lower than Dave. Because, you know, vagina.

Every woman has felt that—that moment when you can see a man’s engagement switch off, and realize that he will never take you as seriously as he would if you came back with a chest-merkin and a handlebar mustache.

But it’s an almost impossible feeling to quantify, and an even harder one to communicate to people who have never felt it. An argument that can be vaporized with an emphatic enough 'nu uh!' is a difficult argument to win.”

— Lindy West, from That Condescending Feeling You Get From Dudes in the Office? Yeah, That’s Real.

Friday QuoteDay

“Feminists have always been accused of hating men because it is a very effective way of silencing a very threatening movement. In a society where women’s value is based on our ability to please men, and where men hold almost all the cards, the worst possible thing we can do is hate them. So when feminists point out and object to the oppression, abuse and discrimination perpetuated by men against women, this is framed as man hating in an attempt to silence us, in an attempt to ensure that we are vilified and ignored by the rest of society, so that male oppression of women and male privilege can continue unchecked. 

 No matter how we frame our arguments and no matter what kind of image we seek to project, as long as we highlight, object to and fight misogyny, feminists are going to be called man haters. 

So I’m not going to waste my time trying to prove that I’m not.”

 — “Man haters?” by Laura on The F Word blog

Snow White With A Thousand Faces

You guys. YOU GUISE. Ask your mom if you can come over and spend the night at my house Friday. My mom says it's OK. We can get pizza and slushies and I've got tapes for us. You can use my My Little Pony sleeping bag. We've got Snow White and The Huntsman and The Hunger Games! And we can stay up late and watch them before we rewind and watch again!

No, really, what a great time to be a 12-year-old girl, huh? 2012 has summer movies that feature straight-up role models (Katniss and Rue in The Hunger Games, Black Widow holding her ground with demigods in The Avengers, Snow White, and later this summer: Brave). I recently caught an early screening of Snow White and The Huntsman, and like Thor and Red Riding Hood, there's no embargo for some early thoughts.

First off, the film needed -- say it with me, the sad refrain -- MORE people of colour, especially women. Also, also? Less heteronormativity. Speaking of, wouldn't it have been awesome if the Huntsman was a lady? Would've pushed that sucker right over into 4-star territory for the romantic tension alone.

At times, the film can't quite decide if it's a Zooey Deschanel daydream of fairy whimsy, a fan-made KStew/Bella YouTube music video, or Lord of the Rings. It's excusable, because it can be a little bit of all those things (all those somewhat derivative and somewhat cringe-worthy things) and still be enjoyable.

Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

Because there's some really good points, such as the fact that the Hero With A Thousand Faces, the You-Are-The-Chosen-One, the DESTINED Child is a woman with chutzpah; one who could care less about the hottie Huntsman and wants to get her Inigo Montoya on and regain her kingdom.

Dwarfs? Trolls? Fairies? All OK for Snowy, but mostly in the way of getting to an army. Let's hurry along now. There's an Evil Queen to fight.


And the Queen! Long live the Queen! Charlize Theron owned the movie, plain and simple.
I mean, really, even the film's marketing campaign can't escape her royal bad-ass. Check out the movie website. It's like it should be called: "QUEEN RAVENNA and that brat Snow White and sometimes Thor."

Snow who with the what now?

Don't hate me 'cause I'm beautiful.

Fairy tales became immensely more interesting to me when, after a youthful bout of literary theory (thanks, Robert A. Johnson, Angela Carter and Roehampton University!), I learned that the princess and the witch were the same character. Snow White is fighting herself.

We're all in the tower, we're all the princess, the witch, the sleeping beauty, the fairy. We're fighting death, fighting for regained youth, and fighting to stave off the fear of the unknown. HQIC (Head Queen In Charge) and Snowy are fighting their own fears that a woman's only worth in a patriarchal society is solely connected to her youth and beauty. Oh, hello same fight most women face every single day, how are you?

As for the romance, I really appreciated that it was secondary, as mentioned above. Snowy did shoot some eyes at her childhood-friend-turned-archer and her titular Huntsman, but thankfully the film did not fall into the trap of the angsty teen love triangle or become Medieval Twilight. If anything, impressionable youngin's watching the film may take away the idea that, hey, maybe young ladies (and lads) like yourself may want to kiss a few boys and see how you like it? And when you do meet a guy you spark with who respects you and makes your heart and ladyparts beat faster, he may not be all Prince Charming-y. He may have previous relationships (or a wife) and baggage and holy hi-ho-hi-ho that's really very normal, so get used to the idea.

The movie was a little "meh" at times, and there are somewhat problematic elements due to the fact that smaller-sized people were not cast in the role of the dwarfs; rather average-sized actors CGI-ed to scale. There are other actors beside Peter Dinklage who would like roles in Hollywood films. No need to hobbitify a role when there are capable and talented actors just waiting for a chance.

All that said, it's a much better take on the fairy tale genre than last year's Little Red 90210 and hopefully just a taste of what's to come with this summer's Brave and beyond. And long live the meaty roles for talented actresses who can be truly wicked.

Friday QuoteDay

“I don’t think it’s terribly controversial to note that women, from a young age, are required to consider the reality of the opposite gender’s consciousness in a way that men aren’t. This isn’t to say that women don’t often misunderstand, mistreat, and stereotype men, both in literature and in life. But on a basic level, functioning in society requires that women register that men are fully conscious; it is not really possible for a woman to throw up her hands and write men off as eternally unknowable space aliens — and even if she says she has, she cannot really behave as though she has. 
Every element of her life — from reading books about boys and men to writing papers about the motivations of male characters to being attentive to her own safety to navigating most any institutional or professional or economic sphere — demands an ironclad familiarity with, and belief in, the idea that men really are fully human entities. And no matter how many men come to the same conclusions about women, the structure of society simply does not demand so strenuously that they do so. 
If you didn’t really deep down believe that women were, in general, exactly as conscious as you, you could probably still get by in life. 
You could probably still get a book deal. You could probably still get elected to office.”

— Jennifer duBois, Writing Across Gender

Facts Are Your Friend

For my North Carolina readers, a gentle reminder that the Amendment One vote is happening on May 8th, a harmful political move that would hurt children and families across the state. The above video states some of the following facts:

Amendment One will harm children:
- A child of an unmarried parent could lose their health care and prescription drug coverage, putting the child’s health at risk. 

- A child could be taken away from a committed parent who has loved them their entire life if something happens to the other parent.

- It threatens existing child custody and visitation rights that are designed to protect the best interests of a child.

Amendment One will harm families:

- Marriage for gay and lesbian couples is (sadly) already banned in our state. But the impact of the amendment is so broad that it snares not only gay and lesbian couples and their children in its legal net, but also any unmarried couple and their children.

- Amendment One bans all other legal relationship recognitions—prohibiting North Carolina from ever recognizing civil unions and domestic partnerships. Thousands of North Carolinians rely on these legal protections. Removing these rights creates far-reaching and long-lasting harms for families from all walks of life.

- Amendment One would interfere with protections for unmarried couples to visit one another in the hospital and to make emergency medical and financial decisions if one partner is incapacitated.

Amendment One will harm unmarried women:
- The amendment is a dangerous step backward for domestic violence and stalking protection.
Domestic violence protections could only apply to married couples.
- In Ohio, where a similar amendment passed, this loophole has allowed convictions to be overturned.
- This amendment has the power to leave open for question how North Carolina’s domestic violence laws are applied—threatening our state’s victims of domestic violence.

Additional facts can be found at Protect All NC Families.

Early voting has already begun. For those outside the state who wish to help, visit ProtectNCFamilies.org. Vote AGAINST Amendment One on May 8th. 
 

Friday QuoteDay

“Women and men do not receive an equal education because outside of the classroom women are not perceived as sovereign beings but as prey… the capacity to think independently, to take intellectual risks, to assert ourselves mentally is inseparable from our physical way of being in the world, our feelings of personal integrity.

If it is dangerous for me to walk home late of an evening from the library because I am a woman and I can be raped then, how self possessed, how exuberant can I feel as I sit and work at the library? How much of my working energy is drained by by the subliminal knowledge that as a woman, I test my physical right to exist every time I go out alone.”

— Adrienne Rich, American writer, feminist and activist who recently passed away.

“Taking Women Students Seriously,” from her book, On Lies, Secrets and Silence.

Friday QuoteDay: Hollywood Edition Part III

"Just over a year ago, my son Felix was born via gestational surrogacy. He came out of me nine months early and because of my broken belly, his babycake was baked in a wonderful angel's oven and now -- I can't believe it -- he's a year old and walking. He has expanded my capacity for joy a thousand-fold.

His life would have been much harder to come by if not for the birth control pill. How's that, you ask?

Well, it's a simple fact: The pill is used for many situations that have nothing to do with the prevention of pregnancy. The pill was prescribed to me when hormonally induced migraines kept me locked up in dark rooms for days at a time. It was prescribed to me to regulate insanely painful cramps every month -- cramps so painful that I often vomited. And here's a little secret I am happy to blow the lid off of: The pill is often prescribed during the IVF (in vitro fertilization) process to help MAKE BABIES!

That's right, women dealing with infertility are often put on the pill to help regulate a cycle so that they might have a more successful IVF. The pill is used to manage ovarian cysts, endometriosis and other conditions too. Not to mention, it helps couples plan for wanted children.

Obviously, I'm not a doctor. I'm just a woman grateful for my necessary and very helpful medication. And I'm sure glad I don't have to discuss any of these conditions, including infertility, with my employer.

A girlfriend and I recently wondered what would be more mortifying: having to tell her male employer she needed birth control to mitigate a heavy flow or just bleeding all over herself in the office?

So with that image in mind, I encourage all women -- and the men in their lives -- to protect access to birth control, and encourage our politicians to take women's health issues out of the political process.

For more information, please visit the most comprehensive and willing advocates for women's health in America: www.plannedparenthood.org."

— Elizabeth Banks, American actress, in a blog found here.
Image via Wikipedia.

Friday QuoteDay: Hollywood Edition Part II

Image of Tina Fey with quote. Click to enlarge.

Full text, for those who can't see the image, below the jump.

Friday QuoteDay: Hollywood Edition

“Patriarchy is not men. Patriarchy is a system in which both women and men participate. It privileges, inter alia, the interests of boys and men over the bodily integrity, autonomy, and dignity of girls and women. It is subtle, insidious, and never more dangerous than when women passionately deny that they themselves are engaging in it. This abnormal obsession with women’s faces and bodies has become so normal that we (I include myself at times—I absolutely fall for it still) have internalized patriarchy almost seamlessly. We are unable at times to identify ourselves as our own denigrating abusers, or as abusing other girls and women.”

— Ashley Judd, American actress, writing in The Daily Beast.

The Measure of Success

“Feminists are having a hard time being elected because they essentially are unlikable. ... Find out if your girlfriend is a feminist before you get too far into it. Some of them are pretty. They don’t all look like Bella Abzug.”

— Phyllis Schlafly, ladies and gents. The Hairpin wryly says that Schlafey, "reveals she's been emotionally scarred by her pretty, feminist ex-girlfriends. No, but she is sharing dating tips with Citadel students."

And on the other end of the spectrum from today's Friday QuoteDay, we've got ERA-fighting Schlafly claiming that women who want things like equal pay for equal work aren't to be taken seriously or liked by men, because even if they are kinda hot, they don't have the proper empty vessel status required for men to tolerate/date them.

(And by the by, the civil-rights supporting, gay-rights championing, feminist, environmentalist Congresswoman -- and therefore "likable" enough to be elected -- Bella Abzug rocked her glasses and big hats style in a way that would put Lady Gaga to shame.)