How to Get Blog Hits, FitC Style

I'm not a successful blogger by any means (I'd never win America's Next Top Blogger, no matter how often Tyra Banks told me to use SEO phrases and smile with my eyes) but here are a few things I've learned from having Flâneur in the City these past few years. Follow my lead and you too can have tens of blog hits from people who aren't even related to you! Tens, I tell you!

1.) Katy Perry's boobs. Never mind the feminist critique that accompanies the photo of KP's candy cleavage and the clear preference for Lady Gaga. Pictures! Boobs!

Lesson: Pop stars can be used to teach anything. Feminism, economics, quantum physics. If you're writing about a subject that isn't spicy enough to draw in readers who aren't your friends and family, throw in some pop stars.

Two for the price of one!

2.) Backstreet Boys! Clearly I underestimated the draw. The 1990s are alive and well in the hearts of Internet users and damn it they will have their Backstreet's Back, all right!

Lesson: Nostalgia = Blog hits.

3.) Quotation marks around the phrase "David Bowie's Penis." There's half my Google hits right there.

Lesson: This lesson really only applies to FitC. But if you have a celeb (or author or musician or congresswoman, but not a real person in your life) you love, write about him/her. Avoid being creepy about it. There's a difference between jest and stalking. And if there's one thing I am absolutely certain of is that everyone loves David Bowie and his spider from Mars.

4.) Obscure hits come from the phrase "fishing lures London." One photo of shining fishing lures near South Kensington mean a few readers have found FitC in hopes of improving their fishing. Sorry, mates.

Lesson: The more obscure, the better. Any topic you know that no one else knows? Write about it. And use keywords that pertain to the subject. Frequently, but not obnoxiously.

5.) Friends with blogs. A lot of my hits come from Shakesville and Feministe; both sport open forums that encourage readers to share what they've been bloggity-blogging about. When I write something related to social justice, feminism, politics, or 90s pop stars, I share. I have a whole Reading List of blogs and sites that I am in touch with, and I want to add more.

Lesson: Make friends with benefits! Also with blogs.